Man Food: Snacks for Men who don't crave dried fruit plywood sticks

Having been on many camping trips with different people, I have been forced to eat many "healthy", "calorie wise",  and "great camping food" snacks. I have learned that these terms mean my snacking on this trip is going to be like staving while on my wife's latest diet. I am going on this trip to enjoy myself, not to lose 10 pounds. After all, we are burning way more calories while out on a trip than we are when acting as an armchair quarterback for the Football game. I understand the need to keep things healthy and not over do it on "Junk" food, but there has to be a better way to snack while in the woods without turning to that four letter curse word.. GORP (Good Old Raisins and Peanuts). The very thought of eating another handful of GORP makes chills run down my spine.

I thought I would give you a few ideas to take on your next trip. They are easy to make, ridiculously tasty and you won't feel like the granola bar eating hippie from the 70's. Try a few of these out and see for yourself.

1.  The Ultimate Beef Jerky - An easy to make favorite for all men. Jerky lasts for months when made correctly.. you can take it on your trip, and not have to worry about it spoiling. It's spicy, it's meat, and it gives you plenty of protein to keep you going on those long days of paddling and portaging, or just sitting around with a fishing rod. I wonder if it would work for bait?... I'll have to try that.



Ingredients:

• 1 Tablespoon of onion powder, garlic powder and optional: red pepper flakes
• 2-3 Tablespoons of cracked black pepper (depending on your taste)
• 1 pound of steak (Round steak or Sirloin steak - fat is bad in this case, the less the better. Cut away any fat before preparing, it will make your jerky taste rancid.)
• 1/2 cup brown sugar, 2/3 cup soy sauce, 1/4 teriyaki sauce, 1/4 Worcestershire sauce, 1/3 balsamic vinegar, 5 Tablespoon liquid smoke, 1/2 pineapple juice.

Instructions

1.  In a small bowl mix together onion powder, garlic powder,  cracked black pepper, red pepper flakes.
2.  Take your strips of steak, lay them out in a roasting pan (Ask your butcher to thinly slice a steak for you, or slightly freeze the steak to make it easier to cut into thing strips yourself) and lightly season both sides with the mix your prepared in step 1.
3.  In a small pot, mix together brown sugar, soy sauce, teriyaki sauce, Worcestershire sauce, balsamic vinegar, liquid smoke and pineapple juice. simmer on low heat and stir until all the brown sugar has mixed in. Allow to cool.
4. Poor your sauce (slowly) over the steak strips and refrigerate for 4-5 hours  to marinate.
5. Use your dehydrator (or your oven with the door propped open slightly - use toothpicks to hold the door open) Turn the heat to 145 degrees, space out steak strips evenly, leaving space for the air to flow. Keep an eye on your jerky careful not to over cook it. It should take roughly 10 hours or so to be finished perfectly.

2) Bacon flavored Sunflower Seeds - That's right, we said BACON. Bacon flavored sunflower seeds will trump dried 2x4's of fruit any day!  Who doesn't love bacon? I can go on forever about bacon, but lets stick to the recipe. First you will need to make Bacon salt, trying not to eat the bacon while you make it. Try to show some restraint. This is such a simple recipe, but recipes are like instructions and men are terrible with instructions.



Ingredients:

• 2 cups hulled and unsalted sunflower seeds
• 4 strips of bacon or to taste
• 1/4 cup of salt
• 1 teaspoon cracked black pepper
• sunflower oil

Instructions:

1.  In a frying pan, cook the bacon strips until they have a crisp to them (Over cooked slightly) - allow to cool.
2. Using a food processor, grind the hell out of the bacon until it is very fine.
3. Add the salt, pepper and bacon bits in a bag. Shake the living hell out of it to mix well. You now have bacon salt.
4. Use a 1/2 teaspoon of sunflower oil to coat the seeds and then use your bacon salt to season the seeds
5. Lay out the seeds on a wax paper lined baking sheet evenly. Set your oven to 300F/150C and bake for 40 minutes. (Keep an eye on them, a nice slight brown color means they are done.)

 
 

3) Beer Nuts - For the lazy men out there. (Still better then GORP)

Instructions:

1. Buy beer nuts

2. Eat them.

 

Let us know what you think of these snacks, and if you have any you want to share, let us know!